The best bus puns are for the discerning bus driver and for people who travel through buses with a wicked sense of humor. A bus is more than just a mode of transportation; it’s also a terrific place to sleep, meet strange and terrifying people late at night on the night bus, and keep warm when the government has slashed assistance payments to the old! Oh, and here are some bus puns for you.
Funny Bus Puns
Traveling by bus is something that many of us do regularly. Reading bus jokes is a terrific way to permit time while roving. Bus jokes for travel, bus jokes for waiting at a bus stop, and bus jokes for getting off the bus are some excellent bus puns to laugh at.
I couldn’t get my refrigerator to work this pre-launch, so I trotted the bus to work currently.
What methods of public transport do superheroes gross?
It is Lightyear’s bus.
I didn’t enjoy being a bus driver. I was persuaded that people were nattering about me late my back.
Unfortunately, The Who’s vintage tour bus has finally failed. It will not be refueled.
My associate was so good at directing passengers to the exits that he was hired as a bus driver.
I lost my occupation because I gave up my bus seat for somebody else. You’re not theoretically to do that when you’re driving, seemingly.
My coworker was always willing to go the additional mile. Unfortunately, that is why he was fired from his work as a bus driver.
Is this bus going to stop near the River Thames?
If it doesn’t, there it will resolve a gigantic splash!
Why wasn’t the skeleton able to wage his bus price?
It was because he was deprived.
Have you checked out the bus website?
Yes, that’s precisely what I’m looking for!
I took the bus earlier today. After a while, the driver instructed me to sit down with the rest of the passengers.
What games do monsters play on the bus?
They play Squash.
When I play snooker, I frequently get a 147. The bus stops right outside the hall.
How do eels navigate the seafloor?
They go by octobus.
What did the bus conductor tell the frog?
It is to Hop on.
Bus passenger: I’d want to buy a ticket to New caucades. Ticket seller: By way of Buffalo?
Bus passenger; It is not the case; after all, I am in the bus mark.
Do you make a stop at the Savoy Hotel, Conductor?
Not on my pay!
This bus conductor was relatively slow! Oh, I’m sure we’ll pick up speed now that you’re leaving!
Did you say you fell over fifty feet yet were unharmed?
Yes, I was attempting to reach the back of the bus.
Have you heard the controversy surrounding the man who boarded the bus in front of others? He became worn out.
Have you heard that today’s schedule for all buses and trains has been canceled?
No. Is there an active strike? No, they’re stopping so that the passengers may get off.
How can a half-dollar kill an idiot?
Toss it under the bus.
On the bus, don’t get an erection, don’t get an erection! was all I could think about as I sat next to this gorgeous Thai girl. However, she did!
What do you term a man who has a bus on his cranium?
Dead
Are buses and trains punctual?
Typically, yes. They don’t, they don’t. Buses travel on wheels, while trains travel on tracks.
What did the bus driver tell the frog?
Trip on.
A man attempting to board a packed bus was forced off by passengers. “There’s no room,” they declared. “It’s completely full!” “But you have to let me in!” exclaimed the man. “Why, what makes you so unique?” they inquired. “I’m the bus driver,” said the man.
Cross-eyed monster: I want to be a bus driver when I raise up. Witch: Well, I’m not going to get in your way.
I didn’t enjoy being a bus driver. I was convinced that people were gossiping about me behind my back.
I lost my job because I gave up my bus seat for someone else. You’re not allowed to do that while you’re driving, deceptively.
Is everyone on board the bus? Before closing the entrance, I inquired the driver. No, called a lady, please wait until I put on my clothes. The entire bus turned to face the woman as she approached the door. She proceeded with a bag of laundry.
Passenger: Is this bus going to travel me to Los angeles?
Driver: Which section? Passenger: Of course, everything in me!
Today was a very horrible day. My ex was hit by a bus initially. Then I lost my bus driving job!
What makes a bus driver different from a cold?
A bus driver understands when to stop, and a cold causes the nose to lose.
Bus Puns
Did you know that buses were created at the turn of the twentieth century to compete with streetcars by offering greater route flexibility? The bus evolved naturally from the horse-drawn coach. Now I think it is enough of history, and let us jump straight into the bus puns that we have collected for you.
Are your school buses running on time?
No, they are running on diesel.
What’s the variance between a cake and a school van, Jamey?
Jill: I’m not sure. Jamey: Thank goodness I didn’t direct you to get my birthday cake!
Due to snowflake on the railings, the Hogwarts Express was canceled; however, Harry Potter was able to yield the Magic School Bus substitute facility to the school.
What is the dissimilarity between a school bus and my daddy’s van?
Typically, school buses do not transport screaming and weeping children!
Why didn’t everyone ride the school bus?
It was too great to suit through the door.
Will this bus take me to London?
The passenger asks. the number of conductors Passenger: But London is written on the front. Conductor: We don’t sell baked beans, despite the side-mounted advertisement for them.
Roger was sedentary on a packed bus when a large woman next to him specified, “If you were a gentleman, young man, you’d rise up and let someone else be seated.” “And if you stayed a lady, you’d rise up and let five people sit down,” Roger answered.
Sam went home from work after a long day. A friend suggested taking the bus home. My mother would merely make me return it, Sam explained.
Tommy Russell, you’re late yet again. Tommy: I apologize, sir. It’s my bus, and it’s usually late. Teacher: If it’s late again tomorrow, take an earlier train.
What do I hold in my hands?
A bus that is double-decker! You checked!
What exactly is a bus?
A bus is an automobile that journeys double as rapidly when you are subsequent it as it does when you are in it.
What would occur if King Kong and a brute crossed path?
I’m not sure, but it could constantly catch a bus!
Do you choose to sit up the stairs or downstairs on a bus outing?
I like to ride on top, but it’s stimulating to bring the horse up the stairs.
Which termination of a bus should you get down at?
It makes no variance. Both ends halt.
What caused the bat to miss the bus?
He lingered far too long.
Why did the bus come to a halt?
Because it noticed a zebra crossing.
What kind of sandwiches do bus drivers eat?
They eat the Traffic jam.
What is yellow and unable to swim?
It is a school bus.
“Dad,” says the child. I saved $3 today by racing behind the bus after school.” “The next time you run behind a taxi, you’ll save more,” Dad says.
I just landed my dream job. I receive my own business automobile worth $200,000. In addition, I enjoy a city view from my corner office. Being a metropolitan bus driver is a lifetime determination.
A bus driver was driving down the street. He drove right through a stop sign without pausing. He then made a left where there was a “no left turn” sign. He eventually ended up going the wrong way down a one-way street. He did not violate any traffic laws. How? He was on the go.
Today was a rough day for me. Someone I despised was hit by a bus foremost. I then lost my job as a bus driver.
I was the first person to put trampolines on tour buses for musicians. Everyone is now hopping on the bandwagon.
Friend: My tip for your date is that you make a better impression when they believe you’ve traveled extensively. Later that day: I rode five different buses to get here.
“What is an alcoholic?” a child inquires of their parent. “Well, you see those two buses over there?”
says the father. An alcoholic would count four.” “There’s only one,” the toddler responds.
Passenger: Will this bus take me to London?
No one told the conductor. On the front is inscribed as London enquired the passenger. Conductor: You can see a canned bean advertisement on the side, but we don’t sell them!
Passenger: Will this bus take me to California?
Driver: Which part? Passenger: Everything of me.
Kelly: what distinguishes a school bus from a cake?
Kate: I’m uncertain. Kelly: I’m relieved I didn’t ask you to bring me a cake for my birthday!
A man in the first row of a double-decker bus withdrew, threw his eye up, and caught it. “What on earth are you doing?”
On the news today, there was an incident in my town in which a city bus lost control and crashed into a house. Nobody was killed, and the city compensated all passengers. I suppose you could say the bus ride was complimentary.
When a bus conductor kissed a female on the bus, authorities arrested him and shocked him, but it had no effect. Why? It is because he was an inept conductor.
My friend was recently hit by a bus while preaching pedestrian safety. As a result, surgeons had to replace all of his left leg’s joints with metal. I believe he understands the significance of the iron knee.
While traveling, I noticed a sign. It stated that the bus lane is now operational. Hopefully, it makes it out alive.
Mary Jane, a young girl, was strolling down the street with her mother. Her mother noticed a quarter in the road and walked out to get it when she was hit by a bus. Little Mary Jane just laughed and laughed, even though she knew it was only a Nickle.
I brought a dish collection tub into the walk-in today at work. I noticed that most restaurant refrigerators are too small to hold an automobile. Nonetheless, I just fit a bus in here.
My son promised to call me back soon as he got on the bus. So, I told him he’d be much safer if he got on the bus!
I’d like to dedicate this song to a friend of mine who was hit by a car last week and is still in the hospital. The bus’s wheels spin in circles!
What is the distinction between a school bus and my father’s van?
Typically, school buses do not transport screaming and sobbing youngsters.
According to my Tinder bio, I have a corner office with panoramic views of the city, drive a $500,000 vehicle, and am being paid to travel. However, they never seem happy when I tell my dates I’m a bus driver.
Today, I handed up my bus seat to a blind individual. I was also sacked from my work as a bus driver; there is no justice in this world for the good-hearted.
I’m terrified of dying alone. So as a result, I became a bus driver.
Excuse me, can you show me how to get to the hospital?”
said an elderly woman. “No problem,” I responded before pushing her beneath a bus.
Four passengers glanced around after I farted on the bus this morning, giving me the sensation that I was on the voice.
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