151+ Best Criminal Puns: Laughing on the Wrong Side of the Law

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, buckle up and prepare for a criminally funny ride! ๐Ÿ˜‚

๐Ÿš” We’ve got the most rib-tickling, knee-slapping, side-splitting criminal puns you’ve ever seen. So, whether you’re a mastermind of mischief ๐Ÿ˜ˆ or just an innocent bystander ๐Ÿ‘€, you’ll be grinning from ear to ear as you enter our pun-derful world of crime! ๐ŸŒ

๐Ÿ” Get ready to laugh so hard you’ll need to call the pun-lice! ๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿš“ So grab your partners in crime, and let’s steal some laughs! ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ’ผ๐Ÿ’Ž

Criminal is an individual who commits a violation or breaks the law. Share some hilarious and funny jokes about criminals with your family and buddies to make them giggle for hours. Given below is a list of some humorous criminal puns.

Hilarious Criminal Puns

  • Where is the skeleton imprisoned by you? In the bony frame designed by the ribs.
  • How did the criminal get away from lockup? By the wall of prison.
  • What would inmates in jail be called who start to be friendly? Pen pals.
  • The short individual who can predict the future, fled from jail was a tiny medium at large.
  • What is the best advantage of a criminal? His lie ability.
  • The two individuals accused for drinking battery acid will be arrested quickly.
  • A criminal arrested for the theft of a calendar got twelve months.
  • Why do newcomer criminals always make bad musicians?
  • Because newcomer pirates don’t have the ability to hit the high seas.
  • A nut known as Hazel threatened a bank saying, 
  • Give me all the cashew you have.โ€
  • What would an aggressive criminal falling from a construction be called? Condescending.
  • The walls of jail are never constructed to scale.   
  • A man took a bar of soap without any permission from the corner shop. The cops said a clean getaway was made by him.
  • Two criminals with the team went golfing. But the fairway wasn’t played by them.
  • Police officer: Have you any idea that your car was reported taken without any permission?
  • Criminal: It wasnโ€™t when I stole the car.
  • Who is the greatest criminal in the sea? Al Caprawn.
  • When the criminal stepped in with a gun, the store turned into a flee shop by him.
  • They made an effort to keep a locksmith in jail, but the nut bolted.   
  • The only thing ancient times and the 1970’s have in common is full of individuals getting stoned.   
  • Some criminals are often waiting for windows of chances.   
  • Aged criminals never expire, they just take away without permission.
  • While taken from a blood bank without permission, the criminal was arrested red-handed. 
  • A criminal lost his balance and collapsed and broke his arm in wet cement. He starts to be a strengthened culprit.
  • What you steal is what you achieve. 
  • Fruit-flavoured gelatin dessert was thrown by him at his spouse, who had him charged for keeping a congealed weapon with him.
  • A clean criminal often makes an unmarked steal.   
  • Why was the snake aggressive at the gold thief? Because the snake needed his diamond which was stolen.  
  • Criminals who take corn without any permission from a lawn could be accused of stalking.   
  • In jail those who declared to be guilty of a criminal offense use cell phones.
  • The individual was a criminal with deceitful thinking and found it difficult to think rationally.
  • Those who lose their balance and collapse into the dirt have to show up and clean their crime eventually. 
  • Do you know about the drug dealers being inspected by the cops? The drug dealers do crack.
  • Being mates with criminals is a terrible idea. All of them are backstabbers.
  • Name a humorous criminal? Silicon.
  • The third degree is a certificate for prosperous criminals.

Why did the burglar take a shower? Because he wanted to make a clean getaway! ๐Ÿšฟ๐Ÿ’จ

What do you call a dinosaur that steals? A kleptosaurus! ๐Ÿฆ–๐ŸŽฉ

Why was the math book arrested? It had too many problems! ๐Ÿ“˜๐Ÿšจ

What’s a criminal’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal theft! ๐Ÿค˜๐Ÿ”Š

Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing! ๐Ÿ…๐Ÿฅ—

Why did the thief wear a calendar? He wanted to take dates! ๐Ÿ“†๐Ÿ’˜

What do you call a detective who solves crimes in the bakery? A scone sleuth! ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿฅ

Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open! ๐Ÿ–ฅ๏ธโ„๏ธ

What do you call a potato that commits crimes? A mashed-tigator! ๐Ÿฅ”๐Ÿ”Ž

Why did the scarecrow become a criminal? He was outstanding in his field! ๐ŸŒพ๐Ÿ˜Ž

What do you call an electrician who steals? A volts-wagon! โšก๐Ÿš—

What’s a pirate’s favorite crime? Arrrson! ๐Ÿ”ฅโ˜ ๏ธ

Why did the belt get arrested? It was holding up a pair of pants! ๐Ÿ‘–๐Ÿš“

What do you call a criminal on a trampoline? A bounce breaker! ๐Ÿšท๐Ÿคธ

What do you call a cat that commits crimes? A purr-petrator! ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿ˜ผ

What do you call a criminal going down stairs? A condescending con descending! โฌ‡๏ธ๐Ÿ˜

Why did the criminal become a gardener? He wanted to rake it in! ๐Ÿ‚๐Ÿ’ฐ

What do you call a criminal who steals boats? A marina-tor! ๐Ÿšค๐ŸŒŠ

What’s a criminal’s favorite game? Grand Theft Auto-matic laughter! ๐ŸŽฎ๐Ÿš—

What do you call a detective who solves cheese crimes? A grate investigator! ๐Ÿง€๐Ÿ•ต๏ธโ€โ™€๏ธ

What do you call a pickpocket in space? An astro-nomical thief! ๐Ÿš€๐ŸŒŒ

What do you call a dog that solves crimes? A bark-tective! ๐Ÿ•๐Ÿ”

Why did the criminal become a painter? He wanted to brush up on his skills! ๐ŸŽจ๐Ÿ–Œ๏ธ

Why do criminals prefer using stairs? They don’t want to get caught in the act of elevating! ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ“ถ

What do you call a baker who steals dough? A bread-handed thief! ๐Ÿžโœ‹

What do you call a criminal in a suit? A white collar crook! ๐Ÿ‘”๐Ÿฆนโ€โ™‚๏ธ

What’s a criminal’s favorite candy? Life Savers – because they’re always on the run! ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ

What do you call a criminal who steals frogs? A leap-frogger! ๐Ÿธ๐Ÿšจ

Why did the criminal become a chef? He wanted to steal the show with his cooking! ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฒ

What do you call a shoe thief? A sneaker-snatcher! ๐Ÿ‘Ÿ๐Ÿ‘ฃ

What do you call a criminal in a sleeping bag? A snug-gler! ๐Ÿ˜ด๐Ÿ•๏ธ

Why did the criminal join a band? He wanted to take note of everything! ๐ŸŽถ๐ŸŽธ

What’s a criminal’s favorite clothing? Stolen jeans! ๐Ÿ‘–๐Ÿ•ต๏ธโ€โ™‚๏ธ

What do you call a criminal who steals pencils? A lead offender! โœ๏ธ๐Ÿš“

Why did the criminal become a gardener? He had a green thumb for crime! ๐ŸŒฑ๐Ÿ‘

What do you call a criminal who loves stealing chocolate? A cocoa-nspirator! ๐Ÿซ๐Ÿ”ฆ

What’s a criminal’s favorite pasta? Penne-tentiary! ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ”

What do you call a criminal who steals soap? A clean crook! ๐Ÿงผ๐Ÿšฟ

Why did the criminal become a dentist? He loved drilling into people’s secrets! ๐Ÿฆท๐Ÿ”

What’s a criminal’s favorite fruit? A fine-apple! ๐Ÿ๐Ÿš”

What do you call a criminal who steals umbrellas? A rain-robber! โ˜”๐Ÿ’ฆ

Why did the criminal become a photographer? He wanted to capture the perfect shot! ๐Ÿ“ธ๐ŸŽฏ

What do you call a criminal who steals watches? A time bandit! โŒš๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ

What’s a criminal’s favorite pizza? The one with steal-ami! ๐Ÿ•๐Ÿ–

Why did the criminal become a tailor? He loved stitching up his plans! ๐Ÿ‘”๐Ÿชก

What do you call a criminal who loves stealing books? A novel thief! ๐Ÿ“š๐Ÿ•ต๏ธโ€โ™€๏ธ

What’s a criminal’s favorite board game? Crime-opoly! ๐ŸŽฒ๐Ÿš“

What do you call a criminal who steals from coffee shops? A mug-ger! โ˜•๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ

Why did the criminal become a baker? He wanted to steal the dough! ๐Ÿž๐Ÿ’ฐ

What do you call a criminal who steals street signs? A road-roamer! ๐Ÿ›ฃ๏ธ๐Ÿ”ฆ

Why did the criminal become a fisherman? He wanted to catch the big one! ๐ŸŽฃ๐ŸŸ

What do you call a criminal who steals cars? An auto-maniac! ๐Ÿš—๐ŸŒช๏ธ

What’s a criminal’s favorite vegetable? Stalk-ery! ๐Ÿฅฆ๐Ÿ”ฆ

What do you call a criminal who steals light bulbs? A bright spark! ๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿ”Œ

Why did the criminal become a librarian? He wanted to check out all the books! ๐Ÿ“š๐Ÿ‘€

What do you call a criminal who steals WiFi? A cyber-thief! ๐Ÿ“ถ๐Ÿดโ€โ˜ ๏ธ

What’s a criminal’s favorite dance? The steal-a-thon! ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿ•บ

What do you call a criminal who steals perfume? A scent-sational thief! ๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ”ฆ

Why did the criminal become a marathon runner? He was always on the run! ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐ŸŽฝ

What do you call a criminal who steals from the circus? A clown crook! ๐Ÿคก๐ŸŽช

Criminal Puns

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