101+ Grandpa Jokes to Make Your Grandpa Laugh

Being a grandpa is a big responsibility—and frequently a lot of fun! 

These old-fashioned jokes can undoubtedly make Grandpas laugh a little about their path from being a boy to a man to, now, a Grandpa, even though some Grandpas are funnier than others. Grandpa jokes are the best method to keep a family laughing and joking together because they are universally relatable. 

Funny Grandpa Jokes

In addition to occasionally making us laugh with their actions, grandparents can also make us the target of their amusement. Here are some humorous jokes for grandparents that also feature a grandfather if you’re seeking some ways to make the elderly man giggle.

  • What are the two things about you as a little boy that your grandpa doesn’t like? First, midday naps are not something you want to do. In addition, you won’t permit him to sleep either. 
  • What caused the demise of Grandpa’s origami business? Given that it folded. 
  • What would a granddad with a lawnmower say in his obituary? He is “now lawn-gone.” 
  • Explain why Grandpa claims he was created upside down. Because his nose is constantly running and his feet smell. 
  • What did grandfather refer to the film “Avatar” as? Smurfs for older children. 
  • Why did dad give Grandpa’s rocking chair wheels? Because grandfather desired Rock n’ Roll. 
  • Why didn’t anyone heed my caution on the Titanic’s sinking? Because you were in, my granddad responded.
  • What transpires when a boy, his dad, and his grandfather laugh so hard that they urinate in their pants? You learn that it shows up in their jeans. 
  • What time does Grandpa go to bed? He dozed off in his rocking chair for an hour. 
  • Who strikes the hourglass every hour? a grandfather who is time-like. 
  • Why did Grandpa divulge his shirt size to the ghosts? The fact that he was the medium. 
  • Why was Grandpa kicked out of the zoo? Owing to his lion’s heart. 
  • What made grandfather prefer to collect takeout for dinner while donning glasses? He uses a contactless drive-through to pick up the supper.
  • After reading “Karaoke Tonight” in a restaurant, what did grandpa say? He only inquired as to the species of fish. 
  • How does Grandpa respond to your request for him to replace his hearing aid? He is not receptive. 
  • What are grandfather clocks known as? the veterans. 
  • If you told your grandfather about your online education, how would he respond? He would declare, “Why does your education matter? How does that function?”
  • What did the big grandfather say to the young child? My height won’t help you with that, boy; you’ll have to take care of your own growth. 
  • Why was the grandfather’s location unknown? Because he began walking 10 miles a day on the day of his 65th birthday, and he is now 95. 
  • Why, at the age of 80, didn’t grandfather wear glasses? He likes to sip from the bottle, so. 
  • Why did my grandpa ask a man wearing skinny jeans and a smoothie made with avocados to come home? Considering that he replaced my grandpa’s hip and looked exactly like him, but hip! 
  • Why do individuals celebrate their grandparents’ birthdays with a shout-out? Because Grandpa can only hear that way.
  • What does Grandpa think is the finest part about being 100 years old? One gets to live without peer pressure, according to grandpa. 
  • How are God and my grandfather alike? as they are both elderly. 
  • Why is this the last day to visit grandpa, who is 82 years old? He will turn 83 tomorrow, so. 
  • What made grandfather count the pennies? Considering that he was the only one with both time and money available.
  • Why are grandkids and grandparents constantly in close proximity to one another? They both share a domestic adversary who makes a big deal out of devouring sweets. 
  • Why did grandpa call granny “Insta-gram”? Considering that he had her on a fast dial. 
  • After 40 long years, how did my grandma get my grandfather to quit chewing his nails? She kept his set of teeth hidden. 
  • Explain why your grandfather claims that his wife bakes cookies the quickest. Because baking them just takes her nana-seconds. 
  • Why did grandpa prefer eating at an “All-you-can-eat” restaurant rather than eating at grandma’s house? Considering that he had control over when to leave the restaurant.
  • Why does grandfather constantly beam at grandmother? He can’t hear a word she says, and he doesn’t want to irritate her. 
  • When Grandpa stated that he silently farted in church, what did Grandma tell him? “Honey, you need to change the batteries on your hearing aid,” she added. 
  • Why, even after 60 years of marriage, did grandpa still refer to grandmother as love, honey, and darling? as Grandpa had forgotten the name of Grandma? 
  • What made grandmother call grandfather Spider-Man? Due to her statement that “That boy finds it difficult to get out of the bathtub.”
  • When Grandpa went to explore overseas, why couldn’t he find freedom? He said that granny followed him and boarded the next boat! 
  • Why did Grandpa suggest asking Grandma for permission to go on a picnic? Because if Grandma says no, it won’t be permitted! 
  • Grandpa claimed he had significant levels of stress from his? Grandmother. 
  • Why was grandfather referred to as a hipster by the grandson? Grandma had informed him that hipsters wear thick spectacles, shop at thrift stores, and have an unconventional appearance. 
  • What did grandpa call the Italian eatery he opened in honor of grandma? Pasta on! 
  • When Grandma is feeling grumpy, how does Grandpa address her? Hello, old b*tch!
  • Why did grandfather always keep the dog by his side? In order to cover up all of his gas leaks by blaming the dog day in and day out. 
  • What made grandfather prefer to spend more time with the grandchildren? Because he was able to play with things that were out of his reach. 
  • Why did Grandpa only see the youngsters for an hour? Since spending just an hour with them made him feel like a youthful man, he claimed that he was significantly older than they were. 
  • What provided evidence that grandpa ought to retire? When he stopped exaggerating his age and began bragging instead. 
  • When people informed my grandfather that my father resembled him, what did he say? “He’s a poor person, don’t worry, he’ll grow up,” he continued.

Hilarious Grandpa Jokes

Below are some other amusing jokes for grandparents, along with a list of quite relatable jokes about grandparents that are sure to make them laugh out loud. The techniques that will generate amusing grandpa jokes for them will all be mentioned if you ask what some of the greatest grandpa puns and jokes are. Grandpas are the only ones who can have such a wonderful sense of humor, after all!

  • How does Grandpa respond to the waiter’s inquiry regarding the restaurant’s food? He verifies, “They nearly didn’t like it,” and nods to our final plates. 
  • What did the waiter who was writing the check at the cash register say to the grandfather’s lawyer? Whoever writes it is compensated. 
  • When the grandfather was unable to grasp his grandson’s jokes, what did he say? “Back in my day, at least jokes made sense,” he shouted. 
  • How, in my grandfather’s opinion, are celebrities and false teeth similar? My granddad said, “These two only come out at night.” 
  • What made the grandfather decline a local anesthetic on the day of the procedure? Since he was anticipating a foreign one.
  • What made grandfather dislike his new walking shoes? Because he unwrapped them and kept searching, but they wouldn’t stand up, he assumed they were broken. 
  • How did grandpa respond when his grandson informed him that he wished to pursue his studies abroad? You have to study a tonne of boards, he added. 
  • Why did grandfather shout “gallons, liters, pints” the day following the Christmas party? He speaks loudly because he likes to.
  • My grandfather entered my room this morning along with a young man with a beard who was wearing thin pants. “Who is this guy?” I asked. “My hip replacement,” my grandfather said. 
  • When he was 60 years old, my grandpa began to walk five kilometers every day. He is currently 97 years old, and we have no idea what is going on with him. 
  • The last time I’ll see my 80-year-old grandpa is today. since he turns 81 tomorrow! 
  • I was asked by my grandfather how to print on his computer. Ctrl-P, I informed him. 
  • He claimed it hadn’t been possible for a very long time. 
  • The final things my grandfather said to me before passing away will always be with me.
  • Fight fire with fire,” my grandpa used to say to me all the time. It’s understandable why he was fired from the fire department. 
  • My grandfather is a man with a lion’s heart. Moreover, a permanent ban from the zoo. 
  • Because of how stingy my grandfather is, when he passes away, he’ll probably go to the lamp and turn it off. 
  • Your life revolves too much around technology these days, my grandfather told me. “No, yours does,” I argued. 
  • I then turned off his life support system. On his deathbed, my grandfather gave me some wise counsel. 
  • He informed me that it was worthwhile to invest money in quality speakers. 
  • The make-up sex during a fight is the finest part of fighting, according to my grandfather.
  • Which most likely explains his brief boxing career. 
  • When he served in the military, my grandpa endured mustard gas and pepper spray. He is now considered an experienced veteran. 
  • My grandfather’s last request was that his ashes be turned into a diamond. That is a lot of strain. 
  • “Pints, Liters, Gallons!” was the last thing my grandfather said before he passed away. That said a lot. 
  • In the service, my grandpa worked as a baker. 
  • He entered wearing a bun glazing. Even at the age of 85, my grandfather doesn’t require glasses. 
  • He takes a sip directly from the bottle. 
  • My granddad foresaw the Titanic’s impending doom. 
  • He continued to warn them despite the fact that they were not listening till they became tired of him and asked him to leave the theatre.
  • My grandpa said, “Back in the day, you could walk into a grocery shop with $2 in your pocket and walk out with a loaf of bread, a dozen eggs, and even a little bit of butter.” But nowadays, he said, “cameras are everywhere.” 
  • My grandpa frequently claims that folks used to be able to leave their rear doors open. 
  • Which is most likely the reason his submarine sank. 
  • Because we were unable to determine Grandpa’s blood type, he passed away. He at least advised us to think positively. 
  • I want to pass away peacefully, just like my grandfather did. Not yelling like the passengers in his car’s backseat.
  • Always strive to be the fish swimming against the stream, as my grandpa used to say. Decent man nonetheless; I was shocked every day. 
  • When a dad joke grows old, what do you call it? An old man joke. 
  • During World War II, my grandpa shot down 12 German aircraft. Without a doubt, he was the worst technician in Luftwaffe’s history. 
  • When my grandpa was young, the alphabet only had 25 letters, he said. Y was unknown. 
  • When my grandfather passed away, he farted, making us believe he was still alive. It turns out he only said goodbye to one. 
  • A six-year-old girl visits her grandfather in the hospital with the help of her mother.
  • She sprints ahead of her mother and rushes inside her grandfather’s room as soon as they get to the hospital. When her mother enters the room, she exhorts her grandfather, “Grandpa, Grandpa, make a noise like a frog!” 
  • “What?” her grandpa asked. “Mom told me that as soon as you croak, we’re all going to Disney World,” so make a frog-like noise. 
  • When one door shuts, another one opens, my grandfather would remark. Although a decent man, he was a terrible cabinet builder. 
  • Dad, how does it feel to have such a fantastic son? Father: Ask your grandpa; I’m not sure. 
  • A young child receives $5 as a birthday gift. With it in hand, he dashes into the candy shop and requests $5 worth of candy. 
  • Do you truly believe it was a good idea to spend all of your birthday money on sweets, the counterman questions? 
  • After giving it some thought, the little kid responds, “Well, my grandpa did live to be 94.” 
  • “By indulging in sweets each day?” The shocked guy inquires. The young child answers, “No, by minding his own damned business.” 
  • A dying Italian guy is elderly. “Guido, I want you to listen to me,” he calls his grandson to his bedside. Please take my chrome-plated object. 38-caliber revolver, so you’ll never forget me. 
  • But grandfather, I don’t really like firearms. Instead, why not give me your Rolex watch? 
  • You lissin’ me, young man. One day you’ll be running the business, have a lovely wife, plenty of money, a large home, and perhaps a few kids. What are you going to do next? “Times up,” point to your watch and command. 
  • When my grandfather traveled to Vietnam, he shot and killed several North Vietnamese by himself. The next year, we will travel to a different location. 
  • A young child was enjoying a story being read to her while perched on her grandfather’s knee. She kept looking away from the book to reach out and touch his sagging, elderly face.
  • How did grandmother get grandfather to give up chewing his nails? She hid his dentures, to be precise. 
  • How did Grandpa’s origami business fare? Result: It collapsed. 
  • Why did grandfather give his wheelchair wheels? He desired to rock and roll. 
  • When a grandfather, his son, and his grandson all hear a joke, laugh hysterically, and wet their pants, what do you say? It runs in their “jeans,” to be precise. 
  • What makes grandfathers always beam? Because they are deaf, they cannot hear a word you say. 
  • Which member of your family rings the hour bell? The grandfather clock, of course. 
  • What words did the mother turkey use to address her naughty son? In response, your grandfather would drool in his grave if he saw you right now!
  • What transpired after Grandpa insisted that the Titanic would sink to everyone? He was expelled from the theatre, to be precise. 
  • What last words did Grandpa utter before passing away? How far do you think I can go before I die? 
  • What motivates grandparents to count their pennies? Nobody else has the time, to be honest. 
  • What is a grandfather whale called? A whale with a hunchback. 
  • Why should you call out to your grandfather? Because there is no other way he can hear you, is the response?
  • A grandfather says to his wife, “I just let out a fart,” as they are attending church. Nothing was said. Now, what do I need to do? 
  • You need to replace the batteries in your hearing aid, says Grandma as a solution. 
  • What time does your grandpa usually go to bed? Three hours have passed since I slept off on the couch. 
  • The hired clown showed up late to a kid’s party. Where are the kids, sir? he asked the grandfather when he at last arrived. 
  • Grandpa gave a serious response after looking him in the eye and said, “That would be us. In the time it took for you to come, we grew up.
Grandpa Puns

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