250+ Udderly Great Milk Puns to Quench Your Thirst!

Who doesn’t like milk? Maybe some of you don’t, but you ought to love these milk puns. Milk is a boring cause that is something that we have been used to since childhood. Something that we aren’t used to is these milk puns that we have curated just for you. 

Funny Milk puns

If you love to have some fun with anything and everything in the world, these milk puns are the finest that you will lay your eyes on. These milk puns can be out of the blue and milk people off their feet. Now that was a bad milk pun. Errrr!!!

  • I wanted to pour some evaporated milk on my cake, but when I opened the can there was nothing.
  • What is a cow that never gives milk? An udder failure.
  • In space you can’t open a bottle of milk. No wonder you have to use cream instead.
  • We must be dairy to throw milk and cheese all around.
  • Maybe you aren’t old, but like milk, I need to sniff you first.
  • What are cows that give Russian milk called? Moscows.
  • These jokes about milk are too cheesy.
  • If you want to make sheep, just release an iPhone with lesser accessories.
  • Imagine the milk going off.
  • Calves drink dairy-free milk.
  • Surely the spoiled milk always gets wanted once.
  • What is almond milk actually? Simple. Nut juice.
  • It took too long for my coffee to arrive. But it’s better latte than never.
  • Drinking milk is a solemn moo-ment.
  • Butter is truly a better whey to you have milk than curd.
  • What do you get from dancing cows? Milk shake.
  • You definitely find some puns here that are better than udders.
  • Milk is nothing a-moo-sing.
  • Yesterday was and udder failure when I was trying to milk my cow.
  • Milk is always pasteur-eyes in a moment making it the fastest liquid around.
  • “It’s Pasteur bed time”, I told the cows.
  • Milk ‘em for all it’s worth.
  • There was udder chaos in the stampede at the farm.
  • Each time I talk my cookies in milk until the bubble stop, am I actually murdering something?
  • Just because you’re a fan of milkshakes doesn’t mean that you have to make the cows nervous.
  • The steaks are really high when it comes to milk.
  • If a cow thinks that it produces almond milk, it must be nuts for sure.
  • Oops! That’s not bad with the milk. That’s actually the milk delivery.
  • Do you know that the dairy factory was always skimming a bit off the top?
  • A forgetful cow will always give you milk of amnesia.
  • He turned out to be a skim artist.
  • It is dairy to rob your friend of milk.
  • Never be lait for a milkshake.
  • I moo-ve like Michael Jackson.
  • I lactose enzymes required to digest milk.
  • If you get gas from drinking milk then you have a problem with your dairy air.
  • It will go pasteurize in one blink.
  • What do you call a cow in an earthquake? Milkshake.
  • There must be a boundairy to keep the milk cows from wandering off.
  • Just because I don’t think milk comes from cows, my friends think I’m in udder disbelief.
Milk Puns
  • Dear dairy, I love to drink milk.
  • When you open a can of evaporated milk what do you get? Nothing.
  • I love to watch Brigitte Jones’ dairy.
  • Never carry milk to any cultural building. Culturing milk turns it to yogurt.
  • How dairy makes fun of the cows!
  • Why to astronomers use cream? Because they can’t open the milk in space.
  • Do they sell cownterfeit milk?
  • This cow’s good, but I prefer the udder one.
  • I love the way you guys cow-operate.
  • Today’s milk was from a cloned cow, but the milk tasted the same as the one we had yesterday.
  • The cow-ncil allowed a dairy farm to be set up within the town.
  • The only difference between goat milk and oat milk is a ‘g’.
  • Let’s wait until the cows come back home.
  • It takes udder dairy to throw milk and cheese on people on the road.
  • Holy cow! You spilled all the milk!
  • Stealing milk from someone’s window is actually a Ledge-end dairy act.
  • Milk is free- don’t buy a cow
  • Cleopatra never could shower under a cow, so she bathed in milk instead.
  • You really think you’re a sacred cow, don’t you?
  • How does milk say ‘hello’ in Spanish? ‘Soy Milk’.
  • I just can’t milk anything of whatever you say.
  • Ask for a kipper ties and you be asked whether with milk and sugar.
  • My cow is truly a cash cow, what with all the meals that I can sell full stop 
  • You are drinking legend-dairy milk.
  • Cowabunga mates!
  • He is udderly dumb but quite dairy.
  • It is no cow-incidence that we have to buy milk.
  • Account never makes a sound when it runs out of milk. There is udder silence.
  • Will you please make up your mind whether you’ll actually drink it or not?
  • Some farmers milk their cows every udder day.
  • Remember the details milks the difference.
  • If you wish to milk a sheep just tell them you need money to manufacture the next cure.
  • Don’t be udder the illusion that the cow won’t kick you.
  • The man was drowned in a bucket of milk and bananas. He was killed by the cereal killer.
  • You’re udderly oblivious to my Cravings for milk.
  • Milk farmers are easily attracted by some nice and dairy air.
Milk Puns

Milk Jokes

Had enough? Not milk! But milk puns! Hell No! We got more for you. These milk puns are fresh and the funniest milk puns that you will read. Milk puns are unlike others because they never curdle!

  • Your absence will make my heart grow fonder of you.
  • Milking cows have hooves because they lactose.
  • I’m yet to come across a land of milk and honey.
  • How can you chew the cud when the curd is cuddling anyway?
  • I’m sure these puns will split your milk
  • Can milk be made any butter?
  • What do you call a tall drink with four shots of espresso and the rest old milk? A latte coffee.
  • Every farmer makes his profits from his cows.
  • Must you cry over spilt milk every time?
  • Soy milk tells you exactly what it is. No other milk does.
  • Milk is the shortest way to a cheesy chuckle.
  • The difference between milk and yogurt is that the latter is far more cultured.
  • I’ve never seen anything as smooth as milk, or anything that’s Milky smooth.
  • Which bees love breast milk? Babies.
  • Why do cows produce more milk when the farmer talks to them? Because they want him to stop talking and give him more than he wants.
  • Have a gadget made of milk to store electricity would be called a buyyery.
  • It was no cow-incidence that we cow-moo-flage so well. We are cows, after all.
  • Why not use raw milk to make butter? It’s just not worth the whisk.
  • Do Kurds eat curd?
  • A bee that makes milk is called a boo-bee.
  • Can you guess water call that doesn’t produce milk is known as? A miss-steak.
  • Any guess the method Moses put in his coffee? Amend milk.
  • Milking sheep it’s so easy. Just sell them anything at higher prices also
  • It is called almond milk for a reason. Otherwise it would be impossible to sell it as nut juice.
  • Hello when the dairymaid was slowed by spraining her leg, the farmer said she was milking the cow too much.
  • Do you know why cows don’t have any money? Because the farmers make them dry.
  • Isn’t it a cream that you don’t like milk?
  • A beautiful milk cow has to be a Dairy Queen.
  • The toughest job a vegan has is to milk the almonds.
  • What do farmers talk about while milking their cows? Udder nonsense.
  • If milk is so nice then why don’t we like being milked of our money?
  • Don’t pamper that cow. Otherwise you could give me spoiled milk.
  • Vegans love almond milk because it’s not like any udder.
  • If a cow cannot produce milk, it must be done.
  • I’ve been on udder failure with everything to do with cows.
  • What did one cow say to the other? Got milk?
  • Seeing their milk being replaced with lemon juice, the old couple went sour.
  • A cow that doesn’t follow rules always uddermines all authority.
  • The sweeter the milk of a cow, the stronger its horns.
  • The milk we get is from a government uddertaking.
  • The best place to get milk in Canada is in Cowgary.
  • No that’s what I call a cow-ld blooded character.
  • The milkman has lost his whey.
  • When cows box, there will definitely be a kno-cow-t.
  • Whey-ting for a long time can make you impatient.
  • Your cow is definitely a-cow-ntable for bringing down the fence.
  • Today’s kids. One was asked to write about the pros of breast milk. The best answer he could write is that it has great packaging.
  • A nation of only cows is a true cow-ntry.
  • When two people boil tea leaves in milk and then put it in the freezer, you actually get solid-dairy-tea.
  • It is only natural that a man who has too many cows will always lose cow-nt.
  • Try saying these five times quickly: ‘babbling beetle bottle battle’.
  • The cow cow-nteracted by charging against the bull.
  • Guess what the wife said to her husband or forgetting to buy milk? I must have skimmed past it.
  • The cowncil takes all the dairy decisions.
  • I got fired from the dairy factory. I skimmed the instructions on how to make cows.
  • A cow that is worshipped is better known as holy cow.
  • Milk that lives in the countryside becomes cottage cheese.
  • A cow that is as smooth as milk will definitely have the best pick up lines.
  • Milk is whey better than most other foods.
  • It was a cow-incidence for the two cows to milked twice together on the same day.
  • Churned milk is actually butter to have.
  • Why can you not just milk up your mind?
  • If you have a dwarf cow what milk will you get? Condensed milk of course.
  • The cow fell while being milked when the rug was pulled from udder its feet.
  • Some people wrongly call spoiled milk BS.
  • Hey! Whey should I not like milk? Nay, I love it.
  • It should drink milk every morning because he did not like juice.
  • Cold milk is always relaxing because chills in the fridge.
  • Artificial milk is actually too poe-dairy.
  • I ordered coffee without cream and sugar. The waitress came back to see that they didn’t have any cream, so would I order a no-milk coffee. D-uhh!
  • I thought that bringing spoiled milk as an example to my gross domestic product class will be appreciated.
  • When you get milk on your upper lip, it is called a moos-stache.
  • A cow that produces almond milk must’ve gone nuts.
  • My cow was so expensive that I had to give it away. It was milking me dry.
  • Milk sure loves cow-co-nuts.
  • Do you know where virtual cows stored their milk? In the random access mammary.
  • Do you know what fraudulent milk is called? Cow-nterfeit.
  • When cows gave milk in the scorching heat, we get powdered milk.
  • Where do astronauts buy milk? Milky Way of course.
  • Dairy here is the smell you get when you milk a cow.
  • Milk is extremely religious, especially since it is always postor-ized.
  • Carry milk to space and it becomes legen-dairy milk.
  • My glass of milk was a-moo-sed with the milk jokes that I wrote.
  • Do you know why milking stools have only three legs? Because the cows got the udder.
  • The instructions said that to make a milkshake you need to give a call or pull stick.
  • The village buffoon took his milk to the church to get it pastor-ized.
  • My dad is the cow-ordinator at the dairy farm.
  • Wow! You are simply udderly gorgeous today.

dy. However, it can also be used to make great puns.

Milk Puns

Milk Puns and Funny Quotes

  • What would you call a milk that manages to get each and everything that it wants? Spoilt milk.
  • What kind of milk will you get from a dwarf cow? Condensed milk.
  • Why does nobody like puns about milk? They tend to be very cheesy.
  • Why are there only two legs beneath the stool used for milking a cow? Because the udder is with the cow.
  • Why did Hitler drink milk for breakfast every morning? Because he did not like juice.
  • From where does a Russian source his milk? From Mos-cow.
  • Why do I never try milking a cow? Because the last time I tried doing it, it was an udder failure.
  • What did the cow tell someone who insulted her? “How dairy you?”
  • What would you call a dairy product that is horrible? “Udder bullshit.”
  • Why did the cow fall down while being milked? Because the rug was pulled out from udder it.
  • What do you say to a cow to get a determined decision from her? You say, “Milk up your mind.”
  • What did the cow say to his friend when they met twice in the same day? “What a cow-incidence!”
  • Which cow has great pickup lines? A cow which is smooth as milk.
  • What do you call it when a cow mixes very well with its surroundings? A cow-moo-flage.
  • What would you call a cow who is worshipped by the people? Holy cow!
  • Where are all the decisions regarding cows taken? At the cow-ncil.
  • Why did the cow charge at the bull? She cow-nteracted because of a previous charge.
  • What would you call a packet of fake milk. Cow-nterfeit.
  • What happened to the man who had too many cows? He lost cow-nt.
  • What do you call a nation of cows? A cow-ntry.
  • Why was the cow considered responsible for all the mishaps? She was a-cow-ntable for it.
  • What do you see in a boxing match between cows? A kno-cow-t.
  • How does a cow commit a murder? In cow-ld blood.
  • When do two cows become best friends? When they are able to cow-ordinate well.
  • Why did the man call his cow stupid? Because she never udderstood a word of what he said to her.
  • Which substance abuse is the cow most prone to? Cow-caine.
  • Cow-conut happens to be the best cow fruit.
  • Which company did the cow work in? At a government uddertaking.
  • What would you call it when a cow does not listen to its owner? Uddermining the authority.
  • Which is the favourite hairstyle of a cow? The uddercut.
  • What kind of a partner did the cow want? Someone who would udderstand her feelings.
  • Where did the cow write everything about her life? In her dairy.
  • Why did everybody know about the cow? Because she was legen-dairy.
  • Where does a cow field during a game of cricket? At the boun-dairy.
  • Where should you call a cow? At her second-dairy number.
  • What kind of design does a cow like on her garments? Embroi-dairy.
  • Why does a cow hate artificial milk? Because the substance is pow-dairy.
  • What adjective would you use for a cow which is extremely brave? Dairying.
  • Why did the cows stand in attention for two minutes? They were expressing soli-dairy-ty.
  • Why could the bottle of milk not be seen by you? Because it went pasteurise in a second.
  • Why can you not digest milk? Because you lactose qualities required for digestion.
  • How was milk sold in the market? It was sold in the “Buy now pay later” method.
  • What would you call someone who cheats others while selling milk? A skim artist.
  • Why could I not imagine to have milk in the afternoon? Because it was beyond my wildest creams.
  • Which book will be preferred by a man who sells milk? Cream and Punishment.
  • What will happen when you buy loads of milk? A hole will be burnt in the pocket.
Milk Puns

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