There are certainly many humorous sea jokes and boat jokes out there, but in our opinion, nothing matches a good sailor pun. You and your pals will like this collection of witty sailor puns; some of them are used as amusing boat names since they make people laugh so hard. What will make you seasick of nautical jokes, if not this list?
Funny Sailor puns
These sailor puns and jokes are sure to cause a stir because we decided to go against the grain. It will be easy to read through them because they are entertaining! Arr these sailor puns not funny enough? Laughter, please!
- For our sailing trip, my pal was running late. It was boat time when she got there.
- A vehicle ferry sailed by. The captain exclaimed, “That’s a pretty remarkable boat.”
- The other day, this large motorboat sped by me. It was Usain Boat, it turned out.
- What is a sailor with conjunctivitis referred to as? Poop-eye!
- This boat has some great tales to tell. They invariably end with a ferry-tail.
- In their boat, a dispute erupted between a brother and sister over oars. They were fighting.
- Why was the sailor unable to play cards? On the deck, the skipper was standing.
- Today is sail day at the boat shop.
- What should you do if a sailor is intoxicated? Fear that he will be badly injured!
- Could you come to get my boat? At the dock, that is. Oh no! Is it unwell? Give it some sea vitamins, please.
- A pirate enters a bar carrying a ship’s wheel in his pants. Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel in your pants? The bartender asks. The pirate responds, “Aye, sir that it is, it’s driving me crazy!”
- What happens if a Finnish sailor gets thrown overboard? Helsinki.
- My sister went around the ship’s stern. She got a harsh glare from the skipper.
- We’ll arrive in a schooner or later, even though this ship is slower than the one with three masts.
- Have you read the story of the sailor who was transformed into a pumpkin pie? A squash buckling pirate, he is now.
- There were two cruise ships in the harbor. “I’m bare. Where are they all? “added one. “I don’t have a crew,” the second responded.
- Looking at an exercise poster, the ferry declared, “I don’t need this.” I’m already in tip-top shape.
- My house received delivery of meat and cheese from a ferryboat. It was a degeneration.
- I once spoke with a pilot who claimed that his true calling was as a sailor. He was in the incorrect field.
- Few sailors (3.14%) are pi-rates.
- How did Viking seafarers talk to one another? Norse coding was employed.
- Why does learning the alphabet take so long for sailors? Since they spend a lot of time at C.
- I’ve created a new talent competition where you must dress as a sailor and consume spinach as quickly as you can. It’ll be known as Popeyedol.
- Why did the seaman give his son the boot? His academic performance was subpar.
- I don’t know why sailors used to constantly suffer from scurvy when they had access to an abundance of vitamin sea.
- A blue and red paint-transporting ship ran into each other. They were marooned on the ship.
- How much will it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced? I’m a Buccaneer!
- What can you do to cheer up a boat? Give it a dose of sea vitamin.
- At Cabela’s, there was a paddle sale. It was a significant deal.
- The red sailboat was struck at the regatta by the blue one. They had been marooned!
- What is the name of the world’s fastest sailboat? Boat, Usain.
- The other day, we hosted a party on our boat. A sail-abration took place.
- How is a sinking ship repaired? Using a seaman’s kit!
- After four months at sea, a sailor arrives on shore leave and enters a tavern. Man, I want to have sex in the worst way, he exclaims to the bartender. How about sitting up on a hammock during a downpour, the bartender responds.
- What causes oars to fall in love? Because they have a rowdy nature.
- I resisted residing in the captain’s cabin on our most recent trip. This didn’t stick with him, boat.
- Why did the admiral choose not to purchase a new hat? He was concerned about the cap size!
- What is the name of a boat full of friends? a friendship
- Why are pirates so awesome? Considering that they arrgggghhh!
- Guy wonders, “don’t these cheap yachts sink all the time,” while out on a friend’s boat. In response, his brother asks, “Always? If it sinks, it’ll only do it once!
- How old are you, one of the pirate’s crew inquired. “Aye matey,” the pirate retorted.
- Why dined on a pineapple by the shark before savagely assaulting the sailor? A pineapple improves the flavor of sailors.
- How does a Navy Captain get his men to quit peeing on the boat’s back? He reprimands them sternly.
- The first of two sailors say, “My girlfriend just sailed to the Caribbean,” in a conversation. “Jamaica?” One of them inquired. Hell no!” She had been itching to leave for a while.
- When I was a young seaman and my friends and I was discussing the occupations of our parents, one of them said, “My Dad works for the post office but my Mom is a Hydro ceramic Engineer,” to which we all oohed and aahed. She works as a dishwasher, he said.
- When should a pirate ship get a fresh coat of paint? when its timbers start to tremble!
- What do sea monsters in Britain eat? Of course, fish and ships!
- Which of these boats is the one I won in the dice game, asks the man at the marina. The attendant says, “Yacht C.” “No. Craps!”
- Not to worry. You’ll learn to sail, schooner or not!
- What’s the connection between a sailor with Tourettes and a dictionary? Sea-man-tics.
- Where does a sailor who is irrationally angry go? Anchor administration.
- What vegetable is a sailor’s least favorite? Leeks.
Sailor puns
Here is our collection of amusing sailor puns. Some sailor puns are unknown and certain to make you laugh aloud. Take your time reading these sailor puns or riddles where the setup or punchline is a question with answers. We sincerely hope that you will find these sailor puns amusing enough to share with others.
- Why do sailors eat shellfish if it’s supposed to rain? The calm before the storm, so to speak.
- The sailors were investigating the waters along the inlet’s rocks. It was an excursion to the fjord.
- What kind of flowers are given to sailors on Valentine’s Day? Forget-me-knots.
- How can a boat look more youthful? Boat-Tox.
- The seven Cs were discovered by a sailor eating alphabet soup.
- My new saltwater boat arrived. For saline, I use it.
- What floats in the water when donning a uniform? An oar Scout!
- Why do sailors grow so impatient as soon as they reach land? due to their fatigue from the rhumbline.
- Ask the stern of a ship to find out what it is doing.
- A sailor enters a thrift shop after an enormous octopus caused him to lose a limb. I heard this is a second-hand store, where are they?” he said.
- I inquired as to if it was now a person after my anchor rope began speaking to me. It said, “I’m a frayed knot.”
- Why is it so difficult for pirates to remember the alphabet? At “C,” they get lost.
- How do ships greet one another? They gesture!
- What kind of vessel are sailors apprenticed on? An apprenticeship.
- Old sailors simply get a bit dingy; they never actually die.
- Although I’m not a big fan of buoyancy, whatever makes you happy.
- “And I would like to thank me wife, me girls, and last but not least, my ship,” said the pirate at the pirate awards.
- I think the people that chase tornadoes are the reincarnated ancient mariners. Even though they both hear the siren and are aware of the risk, they go on.
- How come you can’t tease a sailor? because they resemble a ship.
- The doctor is informed by a seaman that “Doc, I’ve started having nasty zits all over my ass.” “You do, in fact, have a seabum problem”, the doctor adds.
- When does a sailor cease to be one? when he is on board.
- Why does sailing resemble sex? When something is good, it’s truly, truly good. Even when it’s horrible, things are still quite good.
- The instructor of sailing dove into the water for what reason? She wished to see how it would go!
- What aspect of sailing is the most challenging? revealing your homosexuality to your parents!
- What is a sailor’s breakfast like? bOATmeal!
- In public, my girlfriend never uses profanity. She curses like a sailor, however, and it really turns me on when we’re talking filthy around the home. I suppose it’s true that women shouldn’t speak with obscenities.
- Why shouldn’t the Navy give Donald Trump a ship name? Since it will reach new lows.
- My finger felt wetter and wetter as I slowly and carefully inserted it into her hole. Once more slipping my finger out, she quickly swooped down on me. I must really need a new boat, I told myself.
- Why do sailors not enjoy purchasing new hats? They are concerned about cap size.
- How old must a dog be to sail? when he sets out.
- Is there a sailor who is perpetually discovering fool’s gold? He is known as the Iron Pirate.
- Why were there so few seamen in the back of the ship? Otherwise, someone would talk to them behind their back.
- When a Spanish-speaking sailor encountered Poseidon, did he ask the water god if he was always wet? Sea, Senor, says Poseidon.
- Sailors aspire to have a cool persona. But all they are is naut.
- Why didn’t the seaman purchase the DVD? since it was stolen.
- What should you do if a sailor is intoxicated? In the early hours of the morning, keep him away from that cargo freighter.
- How does a sailor organize his travel plans? Despite not having any plans to go sailing, we chose to go sailing for the day.
- Where do sailors arrive late? Because they missed-his-shippi.
- The sailor went shopping, but why? because there was a sale going on.
- What caused Pamela Anderson’s yacht to capsize? It had an excessive top weight.
- What do you call a boat that won’t take on any more crew members? Censor-Ship.
- What causes sailors to be so unsure? because they are constantly far from the coast.
- Why couldn’t the girl boat get going? She lacked boyishness!
- What race never takes place? race in a regatta.
- Did you know that the Swedes and the Norwegians don’t think Popeye the Sailor Man is strong? To the Finnish, he is strong, though.
- Why use liquid soap on ships? When they drop it, it takes longer to pick it up.
- What kind of soap do sailors use? Tide!
- How did the Pope wreck the yacht while it was fresh new? He gave it the name “Holey Water.”
- What does a sailboat intoxicated do? Get Destroyed.
- What do you think of Popeye? Suppose the sailor man worked as a cameraman. Popeye the DSLR Guy
- What was said about Pirates of the Caribbean by the sailor? It’s worth viewing.
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