99+ Stick Puns to Make Your Day

A man enters a bar. Anyone can speculate as to what will occur next because the options are endless. One thing is for sure, though: it’s probably funny. Jokes are repeated, interpreted differently, and handed down from one generation to the next. Jokes are what comedians do for a living. It’s a craft that requires a lot of commitment and imagination. 

Funny Stick Puns

Carry a large stick while standing tall. It will do the job whether it’s for “talking” or for walking. Just be careful not to rely too much on them; you don’t want to get stuck. Enjoy these cheesy jokes and puns to pass the time.

  • I got into a fight at school with a “buddy.” Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never harm me, the man once stated. I then threw a dictionary his way. 
  • What’s the difference between a priest and McDonald’s? nothing… They both put their meat in buns that are ten years old. 
  • What the heck are you making, God? only a wooden stick that ignites resembles a marriage made in heaven.
  • To the individual who took my selfie stick, You must examine yourself carefully. 
  • What is the name of flocking birds? Velcros! 
  • My wife asked me to hand her lipstick the other day, but I unintentionally gave her a glue stick instead. She hasn’t spoken to me in a while. 
  • The USB stick’s creator has passed away. At his funeral, the casket was softly lowered, hauled back up, turned the other way, and then gently lowered once more.
  • What has a foul scent and is brown and sticky? A stick that has the flu. 
  • Jane, Tarzan’s new love interest, has just learned how to swing on a vine. 
  • Among the vines, Jane noticed a long, slender stick dangling. She asked Tarzan, “Can I try swinging from that?” “You may try,” Tarzan said. But believe me, it won’t. 
  • Jane then seized the stick. Tarzan was shocked when he saw Jane swinging from the stick just as proficient as he had ever been. 
  • I observed a person using a pool stick to play the guitar. This was acoustic. 
  • I made a joke about my dog fetching a stick. And he didn’t understand it.
  • This year’s Super Bowl will include some major sticks.
  • After dominating the adolescent stick business, they must be able to afford it. 
  • What treaty brought the pirate to the Super Bowl gathering? Crisps with sticks.
  • What distinguishes a lesbian from a Ritz cracker? The first is a crack eater, whereas the second is a stickie.
  • I observed there were fewer people in the stick aisle than in the water aisle as we prepared for the hurricane. I’m kidding; I’m an American. 
  • What is a drug user’s preferred stock? Crack-ers 
  • What is a dragon’s preferred food? Sticks.
  • I may be as sweet as sugar, but my stick will still beat you! 
Stick Puns
  • I was walking into a store when I noticed a senior Japanese man coming behind me. I held the door for him because he was older and used a cane to go around. With his accent, he said, “Sank you,” as he continued to walk. To which I responded, “How dare you bring up Pearl Harbor like that!” and delivered a stick to the face. 
  • One morning, an elderly married couple is relaxing on their porch when all of a sudden, the old woman swings her stick and strikes her husband in the knee. “Ow! Why did you do that?” He queried.”For 60 years of rough life!”
  • Cane humor One morning, an elderly married couple is relaxing on their porch. 
  • A blind man enters a pharmacy and begins tossing items off shelves and knocking displays over with his white stick almost immediately. The pharmacist hurries over and requests any assistance he may be able to provide. 
  • What do blue tablets and sticks have in common? Both are available when a man has a limp. 
  • In a severe storm, what does one candy stick say to another candy stick? **Hurry**cane! 
  • I once defeated a Russian Grand Master. His own walking stick. 
  • A teacher asks the students how their weekend was. Young Johnny then remarked, “It was Fanta-stick.
  • What kind of American-made cane is perpetually late and obliterates everything in its path? The Rush-cane.
  • On the advice of her doctor, Hillary made the incorrect choice of her vice president. He advised a stick since she required support. 
  • What’s the term for spinning a candy stick? The competition.
  • A doctor changed hospitals and hired new medical personnel, but he wasn’t prepared to stick with doctors. 
  • Why did the man repeatedly refresh the potluck’s candy stick image? 
  • Refresh mints were under his purview. 
  • During a presentation today, someone chose to point with a stick rather than a laser pointer. In his presentation, he requested comments. I referred to it as amazing.
  • A senior citizen is moving slowly through a crowded cafeteria. There is a dad with 14 kids blocking the exit. 
  • While moving past the kids with a scowl, the elderly man’s metal cane strikes some of the kids’ legs as well as his own. 
  • The male says furiously, “Could you please put some rubber on the tip of your finger? You’re whacking us!” If you had done that earlier, we wouldn’t be in this situation, the old guy haughtily responds. 
  • In Florida, I questioned my grandfather’s decision to add wheels to his cane. It was his “hurry cane,” he claimed.
Stick Puns

Funny Stick Jokes

These amusing stick jokes will get people talking. Sure, your friends might become irritated if you bombard them with too many, but true friends—the ones we believe are worth keeping around—will respond to these jokes with a few hilarious guesses before you reveal the hilarious punchline. Here are some of the funniest stick jokes for you to share with your friends in order to make them laugh. 

  • Despite having a back injury last week, I am no longer using a stick. In any case, it was merely a crutch. 
  • Always bring a stick on a first date. Never rule out the possibility of blind love.
  • When several actors are suspected of using narcotics, one of them has to make the most difficult choice. This is Michael Cane. 
  • When time is of the essence, how can an elderly guy get ready for Florence? He takes his hasty stick and heads out. 
  • What in the world has four legs at birth, then two, and finally three? Humans. As a baby, you crawl; as an adult, you walk; and as an elder, you use a stick. 
  • When he was about to torture the other cane, what did the cane say to him? This will be handled very carefully. 
  • My teachers at school were more like Gandalf the Grey, standing in front of me, swinging a stick and not being nice, wise, or guiding me to wisdom.
  • What do you name a candy stick with a pointy tip? some spearmint 
Stick Puns
  • This entire racism stuff is beyond me. Whites, blacks, browns, reds, or even yellows are all invisible to me. However, I do have a stick. 
  • Today’s grocery shop opened at 8 a.m. for seniors only, so there was a large line when I arrived at 7:45 a.m. 
  • An older woman smacked a young man back into the parking lot with her stick as he attempted to cut in front of the line from the parking lot.
  • A teen saw an elderly man tapping his cane to the beat of a Lil Wayne song while he was listening to his radio. 
  • “Holy sh*t! I had no idea you enjoyed rap music! The elderly man responded, “Neither did I. “It all began after my hip operation.” 
  • I observed a man being led by a dog while using a stick. I approached him and remarked, “You must be blind.” 
  • Tell me something I don’t know, he retorted. There’s a tree over there, I declared. 
  • Have you read Marx? One of the two naked philosophers reclining by the pool asks the other. “Yes, I think it’s from the stick chairs,” the other responds.
  • A meteorologist walks swiftly using what? A speed stick. 
  • I tried to eat a candy stick today, but when I opened it, it shattered. I guess it wasn’t in mint condition.
Stick Puns

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