101+ Uncle Jokes to Make Your Day

All kids enjoy jokes, but it can be challenging to find funny and age-appropriate ones.

In order to determine precisely what youngsters find amusing at every particular age, the Wicked Uncle generously conducted a significant study into the minds and behavior of children. This fun Wicked Uncle Joke article is the end result.

Funny Uncle Jokes

These are the funniest puns and jokes about uncles you can discover, just in case you have an uncle’s ear. There are no huge carb-uncles of jokes here; just the funniest instances are presented!

  • Dad was a conjoined twin who was separated at birth by medical professionals. Once removed, I have an uncle. 
  • What made the young confused? His uncles were all ants, after all. 
  • My uncle had lard applied to his back about a month prior to passing away. He quickly started to decline after that. 
  • “When one door closes, another opens,” my uncle would frequently remark to me. He made mediocre philosophy but terrible cabinets. 
  • For her birthday, I gave the widow of my late uncle a watch. She is currently only my uncle’s widow. 
  • A piano knocked down my uncle. His funeral was very understated. 
  • Anti-anxiety medication is taken by my uncle from Mexico. To prevent Hispanic attacks.
  • Timex and Rolex are the names of my uncle’s pets. They serve as his guard dogs. 
  • One day, my uncle experienced a 24-hour epileptic episode. That is what I mean by utilizing the present. 
  • There is an uncle joke, which is a variation of the dad joke. Even while the punchline may not be clear, at least it is all groan up. 
  • Last week, my great-aunt passed away while producing butter on his farm. A really tragic series of events occurred. 
  • My uncle was never willing to submit to his domineering wife. He was an Aunt Defy. 
  • When his sister delivered a kid, what did King Kong say? “Well, I’ll be an uncle to a monkey.” 
  • My uncle gets his chimney examined and cleaned every winter. He does this in order to get his house ready for flu season.
  • Ah, uncle J, You’ve gotten elderly. Use my phone, please. So, in order to kill a spider, I banged her phone against the wall. 
  • My blind uncle told me that the cheese grater I gave him was the bloodiest book he had ever read. 
  • Why are cemeteries surrounded by fences? So everyone is clamoring to enter. My Uncle David, RIP, is remembered here. He would frequently make this joke. 
  • Baby Bear is being asked who he wants to live with by the judge since Mama and Papa Bear are being divorced. So, who is it? The judge inquires. He said Bear uncle. 
  • Remember to use uppercase letters… More and more uncles who write text messages and emails using high-tech gadgetry have lost the knack for using capital letters. 
  • The difference between assisting your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your Uncle Jack is capitalization, according to the proverb. 
  • This was mentioned by my uncle now that there are two popes. Two popes wearing Yankee hats enter a pub. Didn’t you guys use to be Cardinals? The bartender asks. My uncle made a joke about how I attempted to be a tap dancer but kept falling into the sink now that there were two popes.
  • When a little child notices something far in the sky, he immediately goes to his mother to ask her what it is… The boy’s father, who is also unable to respond, directs him to his uncle.
  • Recently, my stuttering uncle was imprisoned… He will never be able to complete his thought. 
  • My uncle prayed to God for assistance with all of his family’s issues. His prayers were heard by God. Next week is the funeral of my uncle.
  • I will never forget my uncle’s final words to me as he lay dying: “I am your Father.” till the very end, continuing with the Star Wars impressions. 
  • From Nigeria, my uncle purchased a piano. He then calls a guy to tune it up after bringing it home. After struggling with it for five minutes, the piano tuner adds, “Let me guess… West African piano?” 
  • When my uncle purchased a new limousine for £250,000, he subsequently discovered that the price did not include aunt.
  • A child queries his uncle: “Dear Uncle! How did your legs become broken?” You see those steps going down, says the uncle. Boy: “Yes,” Uncle: “I didn’t.”
  • My uncle made a blood oath to me that I should wrap up a sock and tuck it in my pants if I wanted to attract girls—I mean, REALLY pull in the women. 
  • It’s extremely uncharacteristic of my late uncle to skip my funeral. I went to his egotistical twit. 
  • My uncle drowned after falling into a vat of whiskey. He was able to repel the five guys that attempted to save him. 
  • I asked my uncle what he did when he was my age and became bored. Never received a response from him or his 24 children. 
  • Me: Like my uncle, I want to become a millionaire. Your uncle is a millionaire, my friend? No, I said, he wants to adopt one.
  • My uncle was out bird hunting when he took the wrong route and got lost. 
  • Recently, my uncle took too much protein powder. What a way to go! 
  • I seized my uncle’s wheelchair after he stole my marijuana. Nobody is rolling if I’m not.
  • My uncle is a lion at heart, a hawk at eyes, and a cheetah at legs. He has training in taxidermy as well. 
  • When my colorblind uncle was depressed, I encouraged him by telling him that “the grass is always grayer on the opposite side.” 
  • What is a croissant’s opposite? A content uncle. 
  • Ironically, my uncle was under the sign of Cancer and passed away after being trampled by a massive crab. 
  • When we failed to recall my great uncle’s blood type in time for him to receive a blood transfusion that would have saved his life last year, he perished away.

Uncle Jokes

Hope you have been enjoying our funny uncle jokes. Well, our collection doesn’t end here. We have more on our bucket list for you. As we all know, no one gets tired of hearing jokes, so here we have compiled more such jokes for you. 

  • My uncle took my nose thirty years ago, and he still hasn’t returned it. My uncle’s name is Voldemort.
  • After one brief altercation, which caused his mother to become alarmed, he was forced to move in with his aunt and uncle in Bel-Air. 
  • My uncle had a deli meat addiction, but I heard he abruptly stopped eating it. He said, “It’s none of your business,” when I wanted to make an investment in my uncle’s Indian restaurant. 
  • My uncle once lost his life after falling from a castle’s roof. But he didn’t pass away. He was moat. -ed.
  • I hope the mother of Will Smith didn’t watch the Oscars. He might have to return to his aunt and uncle’s Bel-Air apartment. 
  • Why is there no Uncle Artica if there is an Antarctica? My 7-year-old daughter just had me laugh out loud with this joke. 
  • Hans, my inept uncle, was a sausage maker in Frankfurt. He once stumbled into the mixer. Hans really is the worst.
  • Uncle Ben would never tell Peter he shouldn’t join the Avengers. But May, his aunt. 
  • My uncle works around the clock as a bus driver in London, driving around Big Ben. 
  • When my uncle and I played Cave Explorer, he continued insisting that there were two characters: the explorer and the explored, despite the fact that I kept telling him there weren’t. 
  • My dyslexic uncle wrecked Christmas. He damaged each and every gift.
  • Unintentionally, my uncle stumbled into a lacquer vat. Although his life wasn’t great, he had a lovely ending.
  • Imagine entering a pub and finding a large queue of uncles eager to swing at you.  
  • What kind of haircut does an uncle on the moon get? Displace it.  
  • Why is ironing your four-leaf clovers a bad idea for an uncle? Don’t push your luck because you should. 
  • My dog is always getting attacked by ducks at the pond, so I can’t take him there anymore. I feel that. I feel like my uncle. 
  • My wife called me a child. I thus commanded her to leave my fort. When I came home, I didn’t want to accept it, but all the evidence pointed to my uncle stealing from his position as a traffic officer. 
  • What rock band consists of four uncles who cannot sing? Mt. Rushmore. 
  • My uncle used to tell me as a child that I could be anything. It appears that identity theft is illegal. 
  • An uncle visits his doctor because he has precognitive abilities. How long have you had that ailment, the doctor queries? “Since Monday next.” 
  • Prior to a race, what do uncles eat? They quickly did nothing! 
  • What events are only 45 cents? Starring uncles and 50 Cent!  
  • Why was the uncle unable to stand on his own? It was too worn out! 
  • Why do uncles have weddings? Since they are cantaloupe! 
  • What occurs if an uncle uses the restroom in France? European. 
  • What distinguishes an uncle riding a tricycle while ill-dressed from a boy on a bicycle? Attire!
  • Have you heard the uncle butter rumor? I’m not going to spread it, though! 
  • Have you heard the story of the uncle who created Lifesavers? He allegedly made a mint! 
  • I had a dream last night that my uncle weighed only a thousandth of a gram. I thought, “0mg.” 
  • Why was the uncle thrown into the well? Since his vision wasn’t that good! 
  • What do you name a business that produces mediocre goods? A successful uncle chips business! 
  • The invisible uncle declined the employment offer, but why? He couldn’t imagine doing it himself! 
  • Do you want to hear a joke about buildings? My uncle continues to work on it! 
  • For swiping my dictionary, my friend’s uncle made me incredibly mad. He heard me say, “Mark, my words!” 
  • In Prague, my uncle is launching a brand-new dating service. It is known as Czech-Mate. 
  • My uncle was just thinking back to the lovely herb garden I had as a child. Decent times. 
  • Do you recall the final words my uncle spoke to me before passing away? Watch how far I can kick this bucket.
  • Why do uncles have hair that sticks? since they employ a honeycomb.
  • Why do uncles bring extra socks with them when they go golfing? Just in case they hole out. 
  • Why was the uncle unable to land on the moon? Given that it was full. 
  • What causes uncles to float in water? They make good buoys, therefore. 
  • Which musical genres did the uncles enjoy? Plymouth Stone. 
  • I enjoy making uncle jokes. He occasionally laughs.
  • Why did the uncle receive recognition? Mostly because he excelled in his area! 
  • What is an uncle with two knees called? One with two knees! 
  • Why are uncles seldom seen hiding in trees? Since they are so skilled at it! 
  • How is an uncle’s home constructed? Igloo it together! 
  • Why do uncles never go on trips? Because they lack a companion! 
  • This cemetery appears to be overcrowded. Uncles must be clamoring to enter the place! 
  • For what does ET uncle stand? Mostly due to his short legs! 
  • What is sticky and brown? An uncle! 
  • Feb., perhaps march? Actually, April may call his uncle.
  • What has a parrot-like voice and is orange? Uncle. 
  • How are uncle tissues made for dancing? Add a little boogie to it!
  • Why does uncle fly all the time? Because he never ever lands! 
  • What kind of shoes do uncles prefer to wear? Sneakers! 
  • What are the questions uncles’ elves ask while working? End the music! 
  • Can I use the bathroom, please? Teacher: “The word is may.” “No, it’s January,” said the uncle. 
  • The uncle was shouting at a vending machine, but why? He wanted his quarterback. 
  • What makes uncle appear ill? Always they lack money. 
  • When an uncle purchases a cutting instrument, what do you name it? Rock scissors at a price. 
  • I recently binge-watched all seven Harry Potter films with my uncle. I couldn’t see the TV, so it might not have been the best decision. 
  • I believe uncles would have a pretty dry sense of humor if they could tell jokes. 
  • Last night, I slept like my uncle. I was awakened by the fireplace! 
  • What’s the name of an uncle sporting a bowtie? Sofishticated. 
  • My uncle once ran a matchmaking service for chooks. But I was having trouble getting the chickens together. 
  • My uncle really wanted Covid-19 to begin in Sin City. Because what occurs in Las Vegas remains in Las Vegas. 
  • Why was the green pepper unable to shoot a bow? Because there was no uncle.
  • P the game, why did the stadium get so warm? Due to the absence of all uncles. 
  • What’s the name of a depressing cup of coffee? My uncle when drinks it. 
  • Why did the uncle decide to pursue a profession in music after a poor harvest? As he had a large number of ill beets. 
  • My uncle used to frequently pursue people riding scooters. We had to remove his scooter because things became so awful. 
  • The uncles quickly identified the murder weapon. The case was brief. 
  • I’m not bragging, but last year my uncle earned six figures. The toy factory labeled my uncle its worst employee as well. 
  • My uncle will track out whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office. I’ll stand by that. 

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